Vidhatri's Oasis
Monday, June 06, 2005
Scattered
Now this was frustrating. Working at unacceptable timing and having stressful long hours seems to be a never ending saga in my life. 1, 2, 3 at night ... oops early morning seems to become my very common working schedule. There seems to be no so-called “personal” life in my “always work and no play” life. Everything had its saturation level, so did my patience too. And one fine day I decided that I am not letting people exploit me this way, so I just left my office by 5.00PM without informing anybody.
I took my bike and headed straight to the beach near my office because I needed a place where I could sit and spend some time with myself.
I sat in the beach, watching the waves going up and down. "Look! Even the work done by these waves is monotonous, going up-down, front -back, just like me doing the same kind of work from past 1 year." But, the waves at least give happiness to all who come here. But in my case it’s just the opposite, I am not happy, people at my place are not happy because I hardly meet them, my friends are not happy because I am unable to contact them. Who is happy? I was happy when I saw the appointment letter in my mailbox, I was happy on the first day of my work, I was happy when I threw a party to my friends for getting placed in the best company, I was happy when I saw a tear in my mother’s eyes when I told her that I got a job because she knew I was good but never knew I was very good to get into the top company. But now, all that looked to me like “Once upon a time” story.
As I kept asking myself endless questions, I looked around the beach. I noticed a bunch of kids playing around. But everybody was looking up. Why? .To find out, I too looked up. Oh! They were looking at the kite. Immediately I looked down. Then, I understood. Among the kids, there was one kid who was flying a kite and others were watching the kite fly with the wind. Each kid took turns to fly the kite. They all looked so happy. Totally lost in their own world of happiness. I could see the pride in each of the kid’s face as they looked at their kite flying very high. Lucky kids! Away from all the worries, happily in their own world of enjoyment.
I kept looking at those kids, enjoying myself seeing them enjoy. The kids were cheering as they saw the kite dancing with the breeze. I kept gazing at them, as I didn’t want to miss their happy expression.Suddenly a strong wind blew. I immediately closed my eyes, to make sure the sand didn’t go inside my eyes. I slowly opened my eyes. I looked back at the kids to continue admiring them. Though I saw the kids standing there gazing the sky, I could see a shade of sadness in their face. I immediately looked up and understood the reason. The thread extended to the kite got cut because of the strong wind and it was on its way down. I looked back at the kids. They all with heavy hearts were looking at the kite taking a dive straight into the water. “God, why don’t you let at least these kids enjoy. Anyways you have been very unfair to me, but why the kids? “, I thought looking at the sky.
I looked back at the kids. I saw them discussing something and walking away from the shore. May be they are going back to their house. Suddenly, one of the kids ran out towards an object lying on the beach. I looked at the object, it was a dry coconut. What was so interesting about it? He called the other kids too. They all ran towards him. All rounded up the object and started discussing. I had no clue what they were discussing. After their discussion, the kids spread out a little bit, leaving two kids near the dry coconut. What are they up to? One of the kids screamed and the two kids in the center started kicking the ball and others too joined them. Wow, they are playing Football. It was awesome way to turn the dry coconut into a football. I could see the same happiness return in the kids faces, which I saw while they flew the kite. I saw them happily screaming and running about the place, trying to kick the ball toward the ‘so- called” goal post. Their energy made me unknowingly cheer them. But, Hold on!!!, I could see a faint resemblance between the kids and me. What was it???
I thought hard …. Really hard. Suddenly, I could see in the air, all the pieces of the Jigsaw puzzle, falling in the right place and helping me see a clearer picture. I opened my eyes wide with amazement. Immediately, I closed my eyes trying to concentrate on the thought that answered my question of the unknowing resemblance the kids and I shared.
I watched the kids in admiration, with my eyes going moist as my thoughts flowed like the waves before me. The kids could have played anywhere, but they chose the beach to the play. They very well knew that though the breeze helped them to fly the kite high, a strong wind would be enough to cut their kite. But still, with all their strength and patience they flew the kite high in the sky, really high. The pleasant breeze that was blowing helped them to fly their kite even better and of course bringing smiles on their faces. At last even when the strong wind cut the kite, shattering their hard work, they still found happiness in a small object that was just scattered around them.
I could have worked in any field I liked, but I chose to work in this particular field. It was my decision. I very well knew that the opportunities that lay before me would take my aspirations to great heights, but this couldn’t come easy. I knew very well, the amount of time the work would demand that will come as a hard blow on my face making me devoid of my personal pleasures. I knew all this very well, but still I got frustrated when I had to face it. In this frustration of losing all my life’s happiness, I walked by all the happiness that always existed around me but went unnoticed because they were scattered.
As I looked at the sunset engulfing us into darkness, I felt a dawn of realization enlighten me. There I could see among the scattered, the happiness of working hard to fulfill my aspirations, the happiness of toiling whole night surprising me with my hidden stamina, the happiness of handling the pressure now to let me handle upcoming pressure with ease, the happiness of getting used to hard life even amidst luxury, the happiness of having a hot cup of tea enjoying the chillness of night, the happiness of getting pampered by my girlfriend when she calls and asks “did you have your dinner? Try to leave home fast? Don’t strain too much? Take care!” , the happiness to see the city getting ready for the day’s business , the happiness of ….. There were so many things around me that were giving me immense happiness, but I ignored them just because they were scattered. My frustration overshadowed all these happiness around me, which if I had realized earlier would have overshadowed my frustration now. Happiness like a loyal friend followed me everywhere; letting me look around for it.
I smiled at the kids with gratitude. I drove back to office determined that before my happiness is shattered; I will find them in the scattered!!!
I took my bike and headed straight to the beach near my office because I needed a place where I could sit and spend some time with myself.
I sat in the beach, watching the waves going up and down. "Look! Even the work done by these waves is monotonous, going up-down, front -back, just like me doing the same kind of work from past 1 year." But, the waves at least give happiness to all who come here. But in my case it’s just the opposite, I am not happy, people at my place are not happy because I hardly meet them, my friends are not happy because I am unable to contact them. Who is happy? I was happy when I saw the appointment letter in my mailbox, I was happy on the first day of my work, I was happy when I threw a party to my friends for getting placed in the best company, I was happy when I saw a tear in my mother’s eyes when I told her that I got a job because she knew I was good but never knew I was very good to get into the top company. But now, all that looked to me like “Once upon a time” story.
As I kept asking myself endless questions, I looked around the beach. I noticed a bunch of kids playing around. But everybody was looking up. Why? .To find out, I too looked up. Oh! They were looking at the kite. Immediately I looked down. Then, I understood. Among the kids, there was one kid who was flying a kite and others were watching the kite fly with the wind. Each kid took turns to fly the kite. They all looked so happy. Totally lost in their own world of happiness. I could see the pride in each of the kid’s face as they looked at their kite flying very high. Lucky kids! Away from all the worries, happily in their own world of enjoyment.
I kept looking at those kids, enjoying myself seeing them enjoy. The kids were cheering as they saw the kite dancing with the breeze. I kept gazing at them, as I didn’t want to miss their happy expression.Suddenly a strong wind blew. I immediately closed my eyes, to make sure the sand didn’t go inside my eyes. I slowly opened my eyes. I looked back at the kids to continue admiring them. Though I saw the kids standing there gazing the sky, I could see a shade of sadness in their face. I immediately looked up and understood the reason. The thread extended to the kite got cut because of the strong wind and it was on its way down. I looked back at the kids. They all with heavy hearts were looking at the kite taking a dive straight into the water. “God, why don’t you let at least these kids enjoy. Anyways you have been very unfair to me, but why the kids? “, I thought looking at the sky.
I looked back at the kids. I saw them discussing something and walking away from the shore. May be they are going back to their house. Suddenly, one of the kids ran out towards an object lying on the beach. I looked at the object, it was a dry coconut. What was so interesting about it? He called the other kids too. They all ran towards him. All rounded up the object and started discussing. I had no clue what they were discussing. After their discussion, the kids spread out a little bit, leaving two kids near the dry coconut. What are they up to? One of the kids screamed and the two kids in the center started kicking the ball and others too joined them. Wow, they are playing Football. It was awesome way to turn the dry coconut into a football. I could see the same happiness return in the kids faces, which I saw while they flew the kite. I saw them happily screaming and running about the place, trying to kick the ball toward the ‘so- called” goal post. Their energy made me unknowingly cheer them. But, Hold on!!!, I could see a faint resemblance between the kids and me. What was it???
I thought hard …. Really hard. Suddenly, I could see in the air, all the pieces of the Jigsaw puzzle, falling in the right place and helping me see a clearer picture. I opened my eyes wide with amazement. Immediately, I closed my eyes trying to concentrate on the thought that answered my question of the unknowing resemblance the kids and I shared.
I watched the kids in admiration, with my eyes going moist as my thoughts flowed like the waves before me. The kids could have played anywhere, but they chose the beach to the play. They very well knew that though the breeze helped them to fly the kite high, a strong wind would be enough to cut their kite. But still, with all their strength and patience they flew the kite high in the sky, really high. The pleasant breeze that was blowing helped them to fly their kite even better and of course bringing smiles on their faces. At last even when the strong wind cut the kite, shattering their hard work, they still found happiness in a small object that was just scattered around them.
I could have worked in any field I liked, but I chose to work in this particular field. It was my decision. I very well knew that the opportunities that lay before me would take my aspirations to great heights, but this couldn’t come easy. I knew very well, the amount of time the work would demand that will come as a hard blow on my face making me devoid of my personal pleasures. I knew all this very well, but still I got frustrated when I had to face it. In this frustration of losing all my life’s happiness, I walked by all the happiness that always existed around me but went unnoticed because they were scattered.
As I looked at the sunset engulfing us into darkness, I felt a dawn of realization enlighten me. There I could see among the scattered, the happiness of working hard to fulfill my aspirations, the happiness of toiling whole night surprising me with my hidden stamina, the happiness of handling the pressure now to let me handle upcoming pressure with ease, the happiness of getting used to hard life even amidst luxury, the happiness of having a hot cup of tea enjoying the chillness of night, the happiness of getting pampered by my girlfriend when she calls and asks “did you have your dinner? Try to leave home fast? Don’t strain too much? Take care!” , the happiness to see the city getting ready for the day’s business , the happiness of ….. There were so many things around me that were giving me immense happiness, but I ignored them just because they were scattered. My frustration overshadowed all these happiness around me, which if I had realized earlier would have overshadowed my frustration now. Happiness like a loyal friend followed me everywhere; letting me look around for it.
I smiled at the kids with gratitude. I drove back to office determined that before my happiness is shattered; I will find them in the scattered!!!
posted by Vidhatri at 11:15 AM
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